Search found 1577 matches

by Kenneth2816
18 May 2018, 09:12
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Poem in Exile in the Fashion of Neruda
Replies: 11
Views: 16929

Poem in Exile in the Fashion of Neruda

Thoughts are of you, my Cuba. How your history bruises the world. The sugar white sands of Baracoa my sister and I bathed in the sea, moon on her sleek, brown body as we watched the Soldatas drop bombs on the Sierra Marstre that quickened the fires of Fidel. I remember old women washing clothes at M...
by Kenneth2816
18 May 2018, 03:13
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Urban Aspirations
Replies: 10
Views: 17563

Re: I think I may have it this time

Thank you. I see others revise in the original post. I've never tried it but will
by Kenneth2816
18 May 2018, 00:58
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Abandoned School Bus Blues
Replies: 5
Views: 9758

Re: Abandoned School Bus Blues

Yes. This is a great poem. Not one thing would I change. I love it and want to nom it... I just learned recently what a dobro was because my son plays in s blur grass band and they are doing a show with a guy named Jerry Douglas who is allegedly the best dobro in the country This poem is a study of ...
by Kenneth2816
17 May 2018, 00:27
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Old Birds - Edit 2 and Then a Short Version
Replies: 12
Views: 19012

Re: Old Birds - Edit 2

Frank this story is worth all the effort you will put into it.
by Kenneth2816
16 May 2018, 20:55
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Urban Aspirations
Replies: 10
Views: 17563

Re: I think I may have it this time

Bernie, Bob thank you. I don't know about you guys, but I simply cannot write s poem without a workshop.
by Kenneth2816
15 May 2018, 11:16
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Urban Aspirations
Replies: 10
Views: 17563

Urban Aspirations

If only for the sake of Tuesday, I should go out for a walk with my one trick knee, laces undone for the edema. I lay out my morning meds by color: azure, oyster, salmon. It is thirty seven light poles to the fire station. On clear days, they pull the engines half out of their bays. The meter man we...
by Kenneth2816
15 May 2018, 10:18
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Naming The Beasts. Revised
Replies: 7
Views: 12053

Re: Naming The Beasts. Revised

Frank, I'll think on it.

Thanks
by Kenneth2816
15 May 2018, 04:48
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: The Rarest Light
Replies: 10
Views: 15767

Re: The Rarest Light

Frank absolutely correct. I'll try to work on it because it is something important to me
by Kenneth2816
15 May 2018, 01:07
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Japanese Woman, Page 17, Life Magazine 1941
Replies: 5
Views: 10532

Re: Japanese Woman, Page 17, Life Magazine 1941

Very nice. Love the muted reference of 12/41
by Kenneth2816
15 May 2018, 00:37
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Old Birds - Edit 2 and Then a Short Version
Replies: 12
Views: 19012

Re: Old Birds

Frank this is fascinating, well conceived and well written..

The seriously long Intro.....
im not a big fan. The poem is sufficient
by Kenneth2816
14 May 2018, 16:10
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: The Rarest Light
Replies: 10
Views: 15767

Re: The Rarest Light

Thank you both
by Kenneth2816
14 May 2018, 01:45
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: The Rarest Light
Replies: 10
Views: 15767

Re: The Rarest Light

Ty Bernie. Their light is blue, hence the name. Only place in the world they are is where I live
by Kenneth2816
13 May 2018, 10:40
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: The Rarest Light
Replies: 10
Views: 15767

The Rarest Light

Legend says Blue Ghost Fireflies are souls of Union dead pinioned to crag and valley, like a bug collection under glass, their just deserts for beguiling the virgin South. No one knows why they come or why they chose the Blue Ridge as the only place on earth. Males hover waist high like miniature al...
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 23:45
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Naming The Beasts. Revised
Replies: 7
Views: 12053

Re: Naming The Beasts. Revised

I know it's big. This is my second revision. It may just be flash fiction
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 23:06
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Naming The Beasts. Revised
Replies: 7
Views: 12053

Naming The Beasts. Revised

In the beginning he had no frame  of progeny, no personal history. Just a man, new-made,  risen from mud, alone. Glimpses of them in the underbrush, foraging the tall grasses, tops of trees, The sun blotted for a time with the thickness of wings, the underbrush alive with their teaming, Creatures li...
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 22:44
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Trying to Get Motivate Now That it's Spring. Revised
Replies: 10
Views: 14584

Re: Trying to Get Motivate Now That it's Spring. Revised

Siva. That's very thoughtful. I honestly font think it very good, certainly not s contender for ibpc
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 22:41
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Tenderfoot
Replies: 5
Views: 10193

Re: Tenderfoot

I remember the original and I like this much more. It's another Frank poem, full of action and indecipherable machines
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 22:37
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Sister Valeria
Replies: 10
Views: 16225

Re: Sister Valeria

Lovely. I would opt for "hazily perceived precision" Drop "the" from depth of field Learnt not as good as simply learned Very engaging,I don't even care what Apps is, the forgiving is enough. This rings as true, I like the wry wit. Very nice job. Your style is truly unique Siva and your range is goo...
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 08:53
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Night Lowers Jet Blue Wings*
Replies: 17
Views: 23348

Re: Night Lowers Jet Blue Wings*

Ahh. In that case it's beautiful. My only comment would be change to
Like your voice trailing
by Kenneth2816
12 May 2018, 08:01
Forum: Writer's Block - Where The Poets Hang
Topic: Ashlyn, Attending a Friend’s Wedding Reception, Meets a Youn
Replies: 6
Views: 10676

Re: Ashlyn, Attending a Friend’s Wedding Reception, Meets a

Bob, I think staying in present tense:
Display vs. displaying.
as he tries to blend in
swing vs swinging
Ponders vs pondering
Hangs vs hanging

Makes it more immediate. The portrait you paint of the young man and Ashlynn is a great example of show don't tell. It's quite a lovely piece