A Chill To Long For

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Billy
Posts: 952
Joined: 22 Jun 2006, 10:56

A Chill To Long For

#1 Post by Billy » 29 Aug 2013, 02:11

A Chill To Long For

A week of below zero weather.
The river frozen. The snow dry
as styrofoam. Whatever moisture's

left has become the sound
of bones crushed under boots.
The dearth of whiteness.

The purity of ascetics and saints.
A chilling numbness of the soul.
A thirst that must wait for spring.

Michael (MV)
Posts: 1654
Joined: 18 Apr 2005, 04:57

Re: A Chill To Long For

#2 Post by Michael (MV) » 30 Aug 2013, 08:21

Hi Billy,

the opposite of a winter wonderland; here, more a wasteland


" . . The snow dry / as styrofoam."

^^ Yes, precise phrasing & figure


workshop suggested here:

A week of weather below zero.
The river stiff, and the snow dry
as styrofoam. What moisture's

left behind, like tiny bones
crushed under boots
in a wasteland of whiteness.


"dearth" ?   The winterscape here is plenty white. plethora-white   white plethora



the last line: "A thirst that must wait for spring."

^^ I also heard:

A thirst that longs for spring.

A thirst that can only be quenched with spring.


And Hope Springs Eternal   -- Alexander Pope


8)

Michael (MV)

 

Billy wrote:A Chill To Long For

A week of below zero weather.
The river frozen. The snow dry
as styrofoam. Whatever moisture's

left has become the sound of tiny
bones crushed under boots.
The dearth of whiteness.

The purity of ascetics and saints.
A chilling numbness of the soul.
A thirst that must wait for spring.

 
 
 
 
 

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