The Lily Of The Desert.

[meenas17]

A wild plant
found in the tropics
rugged and unkempt
stalks shoot up
not in one direction
looks not very exciting
known as a succulent
braves any weather
withstands drought
survives floods
grows in my garden
with Hibiscus,
Ixoras, Jasmine
and Sunflowers.

An eyesore
amidst such exuberance
the succulent grew in all humility.
It is an odd man out.
when I attempted to uproot it
Swedha, my friend,
a lover of plants
bade me not to do so.

Enumerating on its magical uses
she opened my eyes to its intrinsic value.
"Value is superior to beauty" quoth Swedha
Aloe vera,is a protective herb,
keeps evil influences out of the home
and prevents accidents.

As for the medicinal uses,
Swedha continued with enthusiasm
it is a soothing remedy for burns,
and a skin rejuvenator. Its juice is a
natural cleanse, an antioxidant
relieves stomach cramps.

I listened to her with rapt attention.
Swedha! I cried in appreciation.
She quietened me and summed up saying,
Aloe vera is a plant of Immortality.
Ancient civilisations revered it as a
special, sacred, mystical and spiritual plant.

Swedha's lecture was so engaging.
I travelled into the realms of spirituality
dived into the land of Kemet (Ancient Egypt).
I visualised Cleopatra applying Aloe vera
on her brown skin to enhance her natural beauty.

I had neglected this plant all this while.
if only I had made use of it,
I would have remained young and graceful.
Well, that is not to be.

[FranktheFrank]

I like this Meenas,

Please keep on writing, it takes courage, but the more you write the more experienced you will be.

Don't forget to revise your work, keep revising to make it better.

Writing critiques is hard work, but it will improve your skills, it is really important.

[BobBradshaw]

This is a lovely poem. It needs to be tidied up, but it's quite close. I would remove the first stanza. It isn't necessary, and is the weakest stanza in the poem.

The other stanzas exhibit such lovely writing, requiring only some tweaks here and there.

I love this last stanza, especially the last line....the ending is so apt, and just stellar.

I had neglected this plant all this while.
if only I had made use of it,
I would have remained young and graceful.
Well, that is not to be.

[FranktheFrank]

Yes, Bob is right, that first stanza is a gem.

A wild plant
found in the tropics [Maybe: A wild tropical plant?]
rugged and unkempt
stalks shoot up [stalks that shoot up?]
not in one direction [in every direction]
looks not very exciting [you already state in L3: rugged and unkempt - no need to repeat?]
known as a succulent [a succulent]
braves any weather
withstands drought
survives floods
grows in my garden
with Hibiscus,
Ixoras, Jasmine
and Sunflowers.

No nits.

[meenas17]

Thought the same way.
A second thought. Felt the first stanza sets the mood: the contrast, the brightly coloured flowers and the prosaic, dull succulent, would be of interest.
I will read it again and decide Bob.
I miss my revision, Frank.
Old habits die hard.

Meena.

[meenas17]

The wild tropical plant
unkempt and rugged
stood like an odd man
amidst the exotic roses,
jasmine and sunflowers.

An eyesore
the succulent grew in all humility.
When I attempted to uproot it
Swedha, my friend,
a lover of plants
bade me not to do so.

Enumerating on its magical uses
she opened my eyes to its intrinsic value.
"Value is superior to beauty" quoth Swedha
Aloe vera, is a protective herb,
keeps evil influences out of the home
and prevents accidents.

As for the medicinal uses,
Swedha continued with enthusiasm
it is a soothing remedy for burns,
and a skin Rejuvenator. Its juice is a
natural cleanse, an antioxidant
relieves stomach cramps.

I listened to her with rapt attention.
Swedha! I cried in appreciation.
She quietened me and summed up saying,
Aloe vera is a plant of Immortality.
Ancient civilisations revered it as a
special, sacred, mystical and spiritual plant.

Swedha's lecture was so engaging.
I travelled into the realms of spirituality
dived into the land of Kemet (Ancient Egypt).
I visualised Cleopatra applying Aloe vera
on her brown skin to enhance her natural beauty.

I had neglected this plant all this while.
if only I had made use of it,
I would have remained young and graceful.
Well, that is not to be.

[FranktheFrank]

Meenas, I am sorry to say I may be wrong.

A wild plant
found in the tropics [this line does sound better from the original - sorry, I got it wrong, but you decide]

[meenas17]

The wild plant
found in the tropics
unkempt and rugged
stood like an old man
within the beds of exotic roses,
jasmine and sunflowers.

An eyesore
the succulent grew in all humility.
When I attempted to uproot it
Swedha, my friend,
a lover of plants
bids me to leave it be.

Enumerating on its magical uses
she opened my eyes to its intrinsic value.
"Value is superior to beauty" quoth Swedha
Aloe vera, is a protective herb,
keeps evil influences out of the home
and prevents accidents.

As for the medicinal uses,
Swedha continued with enthusiasm
it is a soothing remedy for burns,
and a skin Rejuvenator. Its juice is a
natural cleanser, an antioxidant
relieves stomach cramps.

I listened to her with rapt attention.
Swedha! I cried in appreciation.
She quietened me and summed up saying,
Aloe vera is a plant of Immortality.
Ancient civilisations revered it as a
sacred, mystical and spiritual plant.

Swedha's lecture was so engaging.
I travelled into the realms of spirituality
dived into the land of Kemet.
I visualised Cleopatra applying Aloe vera
on her brown skin to enhance her natural beauty.

I had neglected this plant all this while.
if only I had made use of it,
I would have remained young and graceful.
Well, that is not to be.

Frank,
I have edited the poem.
Thanks for the workshopping.

Best,

Meena.