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Pay At Your End

Posted: 22 Oct 2019, 15:50
by meenas17
the words written
in the post script
of the same letter
I posted. A comeback

I read my letter,
a simple demand
to pay a few hundreds
to an association.

to my sibling,
not a help anyway,
a 0.0001%
I hold in the business.

Those four words
sound command -like,
express scorn, reward
for being a sleeping partner,

for twenty or so years,
Legal action follows
a winding up, a strike off
happens all to soon.

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 22 Oct 2019, 15:58
by Kenneth2816
Relatives and money don't mix. Nicely fine done

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 22 Oct 2019, 20:36
by BobBradshaw
I like the flow of this one, meenas....nice one

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 23 Oct 2019, 00:09
by judyt547
nice flow, meenas. two nits: "command-like" is a combo word, it takes a dash.
the other, "twenty and so years" reads better as "twenty or so years".

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 23 Oct 2019, 19:11
by meenas17
Very true! Ken.
Thanks for stopping by,

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 23 Oct 2019, 19:11
by meenas17
Thanks Bob.
A reflection of my experience.

Re: Pay At Your End

Posted: 23 Oct 2019, 19:15
by meenas17
Judy, thanks for the edits.
I have inserted a dash and changed and to or.