At twenty we were slick
as crows backlit by the sun.
we'd serrate our blank bodies
against the whisker-weed,
skinny dip at midnight
in Bear Lake, the water kissed
your breasts like minnows.
Your hair is silver now
and your eyes are steady.
You trace the railroad track
on my chest from the by-pass.
I soothe the notches where
bright tumors once bloomed.
We are like two mystics
sage and solid, divining each
other's personal history.
Love After Sixty Five
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- Posts: 2683
- Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03
Re: Love After Sixty Five
Wow...so sensitive and moving...with terrific lines and a fab closing. I'm not sure what "serrate" means here...and I couldn't find whisker-weed with google...
the water kissed
your breasts like minnows.
...
We are like two mystics
sage and solid, divining each
other's personal history.
the water kissed
your breasts like minnows.
...
We are like two mystics
sage and solid, divining each
other's personal history.
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- Posts: 1619
- Joined: 01 Jun 2008, 09:17
Re: Love After Sixty Five
Thanks Bob. Whisker weed is a made up term. I used serrate and blank bodies to denote s time when N and subject were devoid of surgical scars. Didn't mean to be so cryptic.
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- Posts: 2683
- Joined: 03 Jun 2016, 21:03
Re: Love After Sixty Five
Thx for the explanation, Ken
Re: Love After Sixty Five
I really like this poem. I’m not sure about the final lines. They don’t hit me like the rest of the poem. They feel over done. I’d like something more real. Just my thoughts which are worth 4 cents with inflation.