"I got kicked off of Noah's Ark
I turn my cheek to unkind remarks
There was two of everything
But one of me
And when the rains came tumbling down
I held my breath and I stood my ground
And I watched that ship go sailing
Out to sea"
--lyrics from "Sweet Revenge" by John Prine
The Ark Sails
That damn Noah—
accountant, bookkeeper, Boss—
was always judging you
by the ledger column he put you in.
He never once called me
I was clearly a poor fit as an employee.
He eyed me as suspiciously as an emptied
cash register at closing time
and me the all night clerk
with bulging pockets.
Boss paid me minimum wage
to shovel his piles of shit,
to scrub the long planks
till they shined like spit.
I had signed on as an extra hand.
But Noah caught his wife's long skirt levitating
above my rising hands
and flung me off the boat.
I waited for him to turn about, determined
not to beg forgiveness.
Rain filled my cuffs.
There wasn't a sprig of grass
that wasn't submerged.
Slowly, the water rubbed against my nipples.
Just wait. When the waters drained away
I'd be waiting for the bastard with my fists.
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